God is in Control

even when we don't truly understand His ways, I just have to remember that God is in control!   We never fully understand His intents especially when a friend dies at such a young age.  God is in control.  He is the one telling us not to worry, that Randy is fine now, no more troubles, worries, demons to fight, he is finally at peace!  No it still does not take away all the questions we may have or the hurt we may feel but I just have to keep remembering the world doesn't work like we think it should.  God has a plan for everything and for everyone.  I believe that no matter where Randy would have been or what he would have been doing, if it was his time then it was his time.  I just hate that his time with us was so short!!

I want to thank God that for some reason about a month ago I went to Randy and Kenneth's to see them.  It had been a long time since I had seen them.  Kenneth took me down the hall to where Randy was and the look on his face was just priceless!  He was so surprised and so happy to see me & Maddie!  I am so thankful that he got to see Maddie again too.  That smile, that shocked look, his screaming, "What!?!  No Way!!!"  Will always be with me! (man I wish I would have had my camera!)

I loved that boy with all my heart and hate that he is gone so soon.  It is like I have whole that I just can't fill anymore.  It is so hard for me to not keep asking why?  I may not understand it or like it but I know God is in control and this is just how things have to be.  I just have to keep praying for that peace, for help letting go of the anger, hurt, and all the questions that I will never get answers for.

‘Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10

 'Cast your cares on the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall.'  Psalm 55:22

 The LORD is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in Him,   Nahum 1:7

Dear Lord,
Please help me to have some peace in this situation right now.  Help me to understand that I may not get the answers I need, and help me to stop being so angry.  Help me to understand that You are in control and that I need to just let go and give it to You so that You can comfort me the way that only You can.  Thank You for the time we did have with Randy and for letting him come into our lives and giving us such happiness whenever he was around.  We are truly going to miss him!  Thank You for the friends that he had, that loved him like he was their family.  Please be with them also in their time of grief.  Help us all find some peace in this.    Amen