Making My Heart Sit Down

Another share from Girlfriends in God.. something I need to work on a little more!!

 

September 30, 2011
Making My Heart Sit Down
Mary Southerland

Today’s Truth
Teach us to make the most of our time, so that we may grow in wisdom (Psalm 90:12, NLT).

Friend to Friend
Every minute of every day is either wasted or invested. Since the Bible contains over 400 verses about time, we can safely assume that time management is important to God. In fact, it is a spiritual discipline that helps determine the rate of growth and maturity of our faith. We not only need to view time as an eternal investment, but as an immediate one as well. One of the most valuable investments we can make is to spend time in solitude.    

I once read an African proverb, “Lord Jesus, make my heart sit down.” Solitude is deliberately and diligently setting aside time to “sit down” at the feet of Jesus. It is in those still, quiet moments of solitude at His feet that we can more clearly hear God speak and gain strength and wisdom for the journey ahead. In order to practice solitude, we must learn how to budget time.    

It’s been said that women must balance their time more carefully than men because women don’t have wives. The fact is that we are all responsible for how we spend the time God has given us. Time is a precious gift. Every morning we are credited with 86,400 seconds. No balance is carried into the next day and every night erases what we fail to use. If we use it in the wrong way, that time is lost forever and cannot be reclaimed. Time that is not purposely and wisely budgeted will inevitably gravitate to our weaknesses and be stolen by others or wasted on the unimportant. We must budget time, just as Jesus did. 

Luke 2:52“Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men” (NIV).

At the age of 12, Jesus traveled to Jerusalemwith His parents for the annual Passover Celebration. When His parents began the long trip home, they did not miss their son at first, and when they did, assumed He was traveling with friends. Jesus was found in the temple - teaching. My first reaction would probably have been pride in the fact that religious scholars and teachers were actually listening to my young son. I would most likely have encouraged Jesus to continue, basking in the looming recognition and acclaim. Instead, Jesus returned home where, for 18 to 20 years, He simply grew and matured. Luke 2:52 tells us that Jesus grew mentally, physically, spiritually and socially. Luke 3 records the beginning of Jesus’ ministry – the single most powerful ministry and life ever lived. In other words, Jesus Christ budgeted His time wisely, resulting in a balanced life of fulfilled purpose. We can live the same kind of life if our priorities are right.

Set priorities:Ecclesiastes 3:1 tells us “there is a time for everything, a season for every activity under heaven” (NLT). We either set our life priorities or allow circumstances and other people to set them. We are often guilty of allowing human standards and expectations to determine priorities for our lives when what we need to do is set our priorities and then plan the days of our lives around them.

Schedule priorities: There is a right time and a right way to carry out right priorities. Ecclesiastes 8:5-6 warns, “For a wise heart knows the proper time and procedure. For there is a proper time and procedure for every delight” ( NASB ). We must schedule time for solitude. We must set aside portions of each day to spend with God. 

Stick to priorities: The apostle Paul teaches us to “make the most of every opportunity” (Ephesians 5:16 NIV). Every challenge will either wreck our priorities or affirm them. Right priorities stand firm in the face of changing circumstances because God empowers them and honors obedience.

One day, we will all stand before the Father and give an account of how we have invested our time. Today, examine your time management habits in light of eternity. Initiate schedule changes that honor God and give Him first place in your life. Make a new commitment to invest your time wisely. 

Let’s Pray
Father, I recognize my need for time alone with You. I lay down my schedule, my agenda and anything else in my life that would keep me from that time. Please forgive me for the way I often squander away the minutes, hours and days of my life. Give me the power to invest time wisely and the wisdom to live a balanced life that pleases and honors You.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn

1. Choose to practice solitude in your daily life.
2. Select a place to spend time in solitude.
3. Lay down your agenda. 
4. Focus on Him and listen for His voice.
5. Memorize Psalm 37:7 (NIV) “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him.” 
6. Ask yourself these questions and use the answers to shape a plan for regular solitude:

• Why am I afraid of silence?
• What is the greatest obstacle to solitude in my life?
• What steps do I have to take in order to remove those obstacles?
• What do I hope to gain from time spent in solitude?

More from the Girlfriends
Learning to rest and be still before God is so important to our spiritual growth, strength and maturity. It won’t just happen. We have to carve out time to spend alone with God in solitude. Time spent in solitude allows our heart to be still before God, filter through all of the voices in life, and seek out God’s voice above the rest. I encourage you to read Psalm 23 every day this month and find time each week for solitude. Escaping the Stress Trap (available in book, CD or MP3 download) can be a helpful tool as you learn to make your heart sit down.

Come as You Areis Mary’s NEW Online Bible Study that begins September 26! The most common invitation offered by Jesus Christ is simply to "come." He doesn't ask us to fix what is wrong or expect us to clean up our lives. That is His responsibility. Jesus loves us just as we are and when we come to Him with a "yes" in our hearts, He lovingly transforms the broken places into beautiful scars of healing that give birth to new life.Enroll before October 1and have access to all 2011 lessons. Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebookor through email.

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I need a Shepherd

Sharing another great one from Girlfriends in God

 

October 4, 2011
I Need a Shepherd
Mary Southerland

Today’s Truth
He tends his flock like a shepherd. He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young (Isaiah 40:11, NIV).

Friend to Friend
Shepherds live with their sheep, finding places for them to eat and drink, providing shelter from the storms and protection from the heat. Sheep must eat the right amount of the right kinds of grass at the right times or they will die. If the sheep eat too little one day and too much the next day, some of the bacteria that live in the stomach of the sheep will reproduce abnormal levels, creating toxins which cause sudden death. The shepherd must carefully plan the path and lead the way so the sheep have neither too little nor too much grazing and are able to get to the water hole on time. Pastures are often lost to extreme heat which means the shepherd has to scour the countryside in search of green grass.

Several flocks of sheep are gathered together at night in a sheltered place so shepherds can share the watches of the night, protecting the sheep from wild animals and thieves. Good shepherds are always willing to risk their lives to save their flocks from any harm, any enemy and even from themselves. 

The needs of sheep, compared to the needs of other animals, are greater because of their instinct to be afraid and when faced with a fearful situation, to run. Without a shepherd to care for the sheep, they would not last long. Sheep are dumb, can never be left alone and often stray, requiring the shepherd to continually find and rescue them. A shepherd never pushes his sheep but rather leads his sheep, going before them, making sure they are not walking into danger. 

Personally, I definitely fit the profile of a sheep. I can’t count the number of times I have stubbornly stuck to my plan, foolishly thinking that it was better than His plan, only to end up in some pit somewhere, calling for help. Psalm 40:1-3 has become my life maxim – with one exception. I rarely waitpatiently. Remember, I am a sheep!

I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the LORD (Psalm 40:1-3, NIV).

I sometimes allow fear to drive me to a place where I am trapped by doubts and darkness until He rescues me.  I satisfy my hunger by eating the wrong things from the wrong hands found in the wrong places at the wrong times. The result is always the same; my soul is soon ravenous for what is good because I have been stuffing my heart and mind with what is bad. 

Like every sheep, I don’t like to be pushed. Good shepherds do not push, no matter how great the temptation.  A good shepherd stands in front of his sheep, gently calling their names, leading them to a place where he has already been, positioning himself between danger and his sheep. When I am tired and ready to give up, I tend to withdraw from the other sheep and even from my Shepherd. Many of us have somehow bought into the lie that we can make it on our own or that the rules and commandments of God do not necessarily apply to us like they apply to those other sheep. The longer I walk with God, the more I realize just how much we need each other and how much we need Him.  When will I learn that I cannot do life on my own – as a sheep or as a shepherd? 

Let’s think about the sheep for whom we are responsible as shepherds here on earth. We are all called by God in different ways to do different things, but we are all called to be a shepherd to someone. We live in a world filled with people who, like sheep, are lost, confused, hungry, lonely, and in desperate need of a Savior. Family members, friends, co-workers and neighbors are all part of our flock. And sometimes their needs are overwhelming.

You live with your sheep or everywhere you go you run into someone from your flock. Your phone rings off the wall, e-mails pile up and you are constantly trying to rescue one of your sheep who is in trouble. The feeding schedule of your flock is not an easy task either. Since sheep must eat the right amount of the right foods at the right time, you must always be prepared to feed them, according to their needs – not yours.  As a shepherd, you must know your sheep so well that you can lead them – not push them – in the right direction. The natural inclination of every sheep in your flock is to run when they sense danger. You may be trying to lead your sheep, but they are either too afraid or too stubborn to let you lead. You may be standing in the middle of their escape route, which may also mean that they will run right over you in their frantic stampede to escape. Remember that they are afraid and in desperate need of rescue. Your job, as their earthly shepherd, is to care for them and to continually point them to the Good Shepherd, Jesus Christ. Remember, a good shepherd is willing to lay down his life for his sheep, just as Jesus Christ laid down His life for you and for me. Do you love your flock enough to lay down your life for each one – the cute, fluffy ones as well as the dirty, broken lambs?

Maybe it is time for us all to stop, listen for His voice, seek His plan and remember that we are indeed needy sheep who are called to love and lead other needy sheep to the Good Shepherd, Jesus Christ. 

Let’s Pray
Father, thank You for laying down Your life so that I can live now and eternally. I am desperate for You. I am lost without Your love and power at work in my life. I don’t know where to go or what to do. I am afraid, Lord. Right now, I surrender every part of my life to You. Please be my Shepherd and my Guide. Help me love and care for the people in my life and point them to You, Lord. Use me to love others and serve them in a way that pleases and honors You.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn
Read Psalm 23:1-6 once a day for one month. Let it soak into your heart, mind and soul and become a living reality in your life. As you read Psalm 23, consider the following questions:

• In what ways are sheep dependent on their shepherd?  
• How do shepherds care for their sheep?
• Compare the two lists. What similarities do you find in your own life?

More from the Girlfriends
Need help? Mary’s book, Escaping the Stress Trap, is based on Psalm 23 and is a step-by-step plan for dealing with the stress in life and learning how to truly trust God.  

Come as You Are,Mary’s NEW Online Bible Study, has just begun. Enroll before October 15and have access to all 2011 lessons. Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email. Pin It

Satan’s Tempting Tactics

Sharing this wonderful post from Girlfriends in God

October 3, 2011
Satan’s Tempting Tactics
Sharon Jaynes

Today’s Truth
“The thief (Satan) comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I (Jesus) have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10 NIV).

Friend to Friend
Adam and Eve had a wonderfully fulfilling life. They lived in God’s presence. He walked and talked with them in the cool of the evening, and He met all of their needs.

“I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it.  They will be yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground-everything that has the breath of life in it-I give every green plant for food,” (Genesis 1:29-30). 

God placed only one restriction on the pair. “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden, but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die,” (Genesis 2:16-17).

In Genesis chapter three, we see where our ancestors made a grave decision that affected every person born thereafter. Satan came to Eve in the form of a serpent and tempted her with the one restriction placed on her by God. How did he do it?

1.    He questioned God. “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”

2.    He denied God. “You will not surely die,” the serpent said to the woman.

3.    He caused her to doubt God’s justice. “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 

Satan is the great deceiver who takes what worked in the Garden and continues to use the same tactics today. He is not very creative, but he is highly effective. It is very important to understand his tactics in order to recognize and defeat them.  Paul said he was not ignorant of the devil’s schemes (2 Corinthians 2:11 NASB), and we shouldn’t be either. Satan tempts us to question God. Has God really said you must stay married to a man who doesn’t meet your needs? He tempts us to deny God. God wouldn’t count it as a sin for you to seek happiness elsewhere. He tempts us to doubt God’s justice. What kind of God is He who would deny you the right to find happiness in the arms of a different man who appreciates you? These are lies, my friend. And just as God warned Eve, they are deadly.

The basis for Eve’s temptation and for ours as well, is the lie that God is somehow holding out on us. Think about it. Can you think of any temptation that does not have its root in that lie? Eve had it all! And yet, Satan came to her and whispered, “God is holding out on you. There’s more to be had than your perfect world. You can be like God. You can be in control.”

Girlfriend, do not be deceived. Satan is a liar and the father of lies. He still tells lies today. He still deceives those who will listen in the same way he deceived Eve. So recognize the lies when you hear them, and stand on the truth of God’s Word to watch him flee.

Let’s Pray
Dear Lord, Thank You for giving me everything I need for a life of godliness and the truth (1 Peter 1:3). Help me to be keenly aware of Satan’s lies and recognize them for what they are.  When I have a tempting thought, I pray that the Holy Spirit will convict me, help me replace the lie with truth, and give me the power to walk the other way.  I want to be like David who said, “I have hidden your Word in my heart that I might not sin against you,” (Psalm 119:11).
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn
I asked a question earlier, but let’s think about it again.

Can you think of any temptation that is not based on the lie that God is holding out on you? 

How did Jesus fight Satan’s temptations when he was in the desert? (Matthew 4)

What did Satan do after Jesus answered him with Scripture?

What will Satan do when we fight him with Scripture? (James 4:7)

More from the Girlfriends
Satan has a whole bunch of lies to try to make us girls feel inferior, insecure, and inadequate.  If you would like to learn how to fight the enemy by recognizing the lies, rejecting the lies, and replacing the lies with truth, then you’ll want to read Sharon’s book,I’m Not Good Enough…and Other Lies Women Tell Themselves. It also comes with a Bible study guide perfect for groups or individual study Pin It

A Great Plan by Mary Southerland

Another great email from Girlfriends in God, that was too good not to share! 

 

June 21, 2011

A Great Plan

Mary Southerland

Today’s Truth
The LORD is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trust in him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy” (Psalm 28:7).

Friend To Friend
I love the story of a tourist visiting the Grand Canyon. As he gazed in wonder at the sight before him, the tourist got too close to the edge, lost his footing and fell over the side. Just before he went out of sight, the man grabbed a scrubby bush and held on for dear life. Filled with terror, he called out toward heaven, “Is anyone up there?” A calm powerful voice came out of the sky, “Yes, there is.” The tourist pleaded, “Can you help me?” The calm voice replied, “I’m sure I can. What seems to be the problem?” The man explained, “I fell over the edge of the canyon and am now dangling in space, holding onto a bush that’s about to come loose. Please help me!” The voice said, “I will. Do you have faith?” The terrified man replied, “Yes! I have strong faith!” The voice said, “Then just let go. Everything will be fine.” There was a tense pause. The tourist then yelled, “Is there anyone else up there?”

The first time I heard that story, I laughed and thought, “How ridiculous!” My next thought was that I have more in common with the tourist than I care to admit.

How often do I edge my way toward a dangerous cliff of disobedience and find myself giving in to temptation? How many times have I cried out to God to rescue me from some self-made pit into which I have fallen, but dictated how I wanted to be rescued? I can’t begin to count the number of times when I have foolishly chosen to follow my plan instead of God’s plan for my life. Now that’s ridiculous.

Max Lucado tells the story of buying a new bicycle for his oldest daughter. It was her first “real” bike because it had no training wheels. After watching her sister ride the new bicycle, his younger daughter wanted a new bike, too. Max Lucado explained, “Your sister is older. She doesn’t need training wheels anymore.” His young daughter was not buying his story and kept badgering him for a new bike. In frustration, Max Lucado finally said, “Honey, I am your dad. You are just going to have to trust me this time.” His daughter thought for a moment before responding, “No. I’m just gonna get me a different daddy.”

God has a unique plan for each one of us that is beyond human understanding or expectation.  It is called His will. God has been making His will known from the very beginning of time. In the Garden of Eden God revealed to Adam and Eve His will or plan for their lives. It is important to note that with the revealed plan He also gave them the choice to obey because He is a loving Father and a gracious God. Knowing that His way was right, God still allowed Adam and Eve to choose the wrong way. They made the wrong choice - but He still loved them and forgave them.  He will do the same for you.

The Bible promises that God’s plan is the best plan; the one for which we were created. Psalm 32:8 “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.” God agrees to not only show us the plan, He promises to provide all of the strength and resources needed to carry out that plan.  His sufficient and constant power is unleashed by our choice to accept and follow His blueprint for victorious living.

We were created by the One who knows us best and loves us most. There are no accidents with God. He never has to say, “Oops!” Before we were ever conceived in the heart and mind of man we were conceived in the heart and mind of God. Wanted, loved and planned since before the world began. He had a plan in mind and lovingly, purposefully created us in response to that plan. 

I know that there are days when the will of God seems completely wrong and we simply do not understand. Every moment is pregnant with darkness and our hearts are numb, paralyzed by fear and doubt. We are treading water in the storm tossed sea of life, desperately longing to see Him walking on the treacherous waves toward us, rescue in His hand. It is in those shadowed moments that we must choose to trust the Plan Maker even though our faith is small and we cannot understand the plan. His ways are higher than our ways. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. And one day, every one of our question marks will be yanked into exclamation points as we see that high plan as He sees it – perfect.

For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11, NLT).

Today, my friend set aside your meager agenda. Lay down your limited life arrangement and look for God to meet you at the point of surrender - power and victory in His hands. Now that is a great plan.

Let’s Pray
Father, please forgive me when I stubbornly choose to ignore Your plan for my life. Thank You for always being there for me, ready to rescue me from my own selfish desires and decisions. Help me to remember that Your plan is the highest plan for my life and give me the strength to follow that plan. I want to honor and please You, Lord.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn
What things or people besides Jesus are you tempted to place your trust in during a crisis?
What keeps you from fully trusting the words of Jesus?
How would your life be different if you chose to place your trust in Jesus alone?

Read Matthew 7:24-28. How do these verses relate to your faith in God and the results of trusting Him?

“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse, because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash. When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching.” (Matthew 7:24-28).

More From The Girlfriends
I know that plans are rampant in your life - but the only plan that really matters is the one God has for you. Don’t settle for anything less. Need help dealing with temptation? Check out Mary’s Bible Study (E-Book download), Winning the War with Temptation.Don’t miss Mary’s NEW weekly Online Bible StudyUnder the Influence…of Love. Learn five powerful steps you can take to forgive and love your enemies. Enroll now and have access to all 2011 lessons. Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebookor through email. Pin It

How to Enjoy Your Family part 2

 

May 11, 2011

How to Enjoy Your Family

Part 2

Mary Southerland

Today’s Truth
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy (Proverbs 31:13-15, 20, NIV).

Friend to Friend
Family is important to God. He created it before He created the church and, as with each of His creations, He made a plan for it to succeed. At the heart of that plan is love. To be part of a family is to be loved. Yesterday, we saw that the first step to loving our family is to build trust. The second step is to serve our family with joy.  We are told by many to serve ourselves - not others. The Proverbs 31 woman had every opportunity to live a life of leisure.

• She had a prominent husband.
• She had a lot of influence.
• She was visible and active in the community.
• She was in charge of charity events.

But she got up while it was still dark to make breakfast for her family and for those who served her. Proverbs 31:13 tells us she worked with “eager” hands. The literal meaning of “eager” is “in delight or in chosen joy.” In other words, she chose to serve with joy, which means we can choose to serve our family with joy as well.  Jesus teaches the truth that service is a natural result of love.

Galatians 5:13 “For, dear brothers, you have been given freedom: not freedom to do wrong, but freedom to love and serve each other.”

Yet, many of us find it easier to serve everyone in love except our family. When my husband, Dan, was a youth pastor, we saw a variety of family dynamics. At one church, a young man came to us in tears. I will never forget his words, “My parents are getting a divorce because mom has time for everyone in the world except my dad and me!” Service to those we love and call family should not be a burden. In fact, an attitude of service is contagious. The best way to teach your family to serve is to serve them.

From childhood, making the bed was one of my kids’ daily chores. I told them that one day a week, I would make their bed for them. It could be a day when they were running late for school, when they were too tired or didn’t feel well. Whatever the reason, I would serve them by making their bed one day a week. One morning, I was running behind and in a hurry to visit my husband who was recovering from an emergency appendectomy. I had been at the hospital day and night for a week and was exhausted. I got up very early, took one look at my bed and decided I just didn’t want to make it. I went to take a shower, hoping it would wake me up. When I came out, Danna, our eleven-year-old daughter had made my bed. To love our family, we must serve with joy.

Plan well.
Proverbs 31:15b, 21, 27 (LB) “She plans the day's work. She has no fear of winter for her household, for she has made warm clothes for all of them. She watches carefully all that goes on throughout her household.”

Planning prevents chaos. The Proverbs 31 woman was in control of her home and her life. The control came from good planning. She mastered the skill of homemaking before she ever set foot in the workplace. She set her priorities; then arranged her life around them. She didn’t allow others to set priorities for her and she did what was important, not just urgent. Have you noticed that the urgent things in life barge in demanding attention while the important things wait to be chosen? We can spend a lifetime on the urgent and miss the most important things God has for us. We must set family priorities because if we don’t, the world will.

The Proverbs 31 woman knew what needed to be done and made sure that it was done first and in the right way. She didn’t fear winter or the hard times because she was prepared. Family should provide the most satisfying earthly relationships. If it doesn’t, the problem may be with our planning. Here are some practical tips for planning:

• Budget your time. 
• Choose one day a week to plan.
• Eliminate. Have an “elimination” meeting once a month with your family. Eliminate the things that hurt your family.
• Learn to leave the “lesser” things undone.
• Delegate. Include everyone in the family in the work as well as the playing.
• Simplify. Give up on perfection. It’s for heaven - not earth.
• Plan well. It demonstrates your love for your family.

Work hard.
Proverbs 31:16-18 (LB) “She goes out to inspect a field and buys it; with her own hands she plants a vineyard. She is a hard worker. She works far into the night.”

There is nothing lazy about this woman. Laziness should not be part of our character as women of God. The Proverbs 31 woman was busy, but not too busy …and she was not busy doing the wrong things. Busyness does not always equal productivity. I believe a woman can have it all - a career, a family. I’m just not sure she can have it all at the same time. This woman has a strong sense of who she is and what God created her to be.  She has a clear plan for life. And notice she doesn’t do all of the work herself. (By the way, this is your Scriptural justification for a maid or as I tell my children,”Why do you think God made kids?”) Working together builds a sense of family. In a nationwide survey, thousands of school children were asked, “What makes a happy family?” The most-mentioned key to happiness was “doing things together.” Plan family projects and family work days. At the end of the day, order a pizza and rent a movie as a reward. You can build some of your greatest family traditions and memories around work. When our kids were younger, we bought our Christmas tree and put up our Christmas lights every Thanksgiving weekend.  While it is a lot of work, it is also a family tradition.                

A woman who loves her family is willing to work hard for them and with them, planning well and building trust.

Let’s Pray
Father, family is so important to You and I want it to be that important to me as well. Thank You for the family You have given me. I love each one of them and want them to be sure of my love. Please help me love them in ways they can understand. I pray that our family will be filled with trust and become a haven for each family member. Be glorified in our home and in our family. 

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

Now it’s your turn

• Identify areas of your family life that need to be more structured.
• Establish a weekly family meeting to plan and connect as a family. 
• Use the principles in step three to become a better planner.
• Establish a new family tradition that invites every family member to participate.

More from the Girlfriends
I once heard someone say, “Home is the place you go where they have to take you in.” I love that statement. And it really is true. Tomorrow, we conclude this study on how to enjoy your family. I pray that it is making a difference in your life and in your family. Remember, your home and family is the best place for God to show up and demonstrate Who He really is. Need help? Check out Mary’s resources on marriage, parenting anddifficult relationships. If you need help dealing with the pain in your life, enroll in Mary’s weekly online Bible Study,How to Handle Hurtand learn how to face and deal with the pain in your life. Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
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Girlfriends in God
P.O. Box 725
Matthews, NC 28106
info@girlfriendsingod.com
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How to Enjoy Your Family

I am on vacation this week so I thought I would post some wonderful emails that I have gotten.  Hope you enjoy!!

May 12, 2011
How to Enjoy Your Family
Part 3

Mary Southerland

Today’s Truth
When she speaks, her words are wise, and kindness is the rule for everything she says (Proverbs 31:26, TLB).

Friend to Friend
Family is important to God. He created it before He created the church and, as with each of His creations, He made a plan for it to succeed. At the heart of that plan is love. To be part of a family is to be loved. Over the last two days, we have examined the first steps to loving your family; to build trust, to serve them with joy, to plan well and to work hard.  We can also love and enjoy our family by guarding our tongue.

Control your tongue.
The power of the spoken word is great. Words are like seeds. What we plant will grow.  If we plant negative, critical words, we will reap a family that is negative and critical.  Look for the good in your family then speak it. Be a cheerleader for your family because everyone needs a cheerleader.

A little girl was eating breakfast with her Daddy. They were on a “date,” spending special time together. He was telling her how wonderful she was and how proud he was to have her as a daughter. When he had done what he thought was a sufficient job, he picked up his fork and began to eat. His daughter put her hand on his arm and stopped him with these words, “Longer, Daddy, longer.” He didn’t eat much food that day but a little girl’s hungry heart was fed. Do have any hearts like that in your family?

CBS released a movie about Karen Carpenter, the great singer who rose to stardom singing with her brother, Richard. At the age of 32, she died unexpectedly of heart failure due to many years of abuse caused by Anorexia. What brought on Karen's fatal obsession with weight control? It seems that a reporter once called her "Richard's chubby sister."

Psalm 141:3 “Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD: keep watch over the door of my lips.”

Before speaking, ask yourself the following questions.

   T       is it true
   H      Is it helpful
    I       is it inspiring
   N      is it necessary
   K       is it kind

Think before you speak. Use the five to one ratio when correcting - five positive remarks to one negative comment. The harder the truth, the more love we should use in saying it. It is our responsibility to use our words to train and instruct our family about the daily things in life, but more importantly, to instruct them about the eternal things. We are very concerned about providing for our children when we need to be more concerned about caring for our children. The greatest care we can give is to disciple them by speaking words of truth. Guard your tongue.

Take care of yourself.
The Proverbs 31 woman certainly did. “She is energetic. Her own clothing is beautifully made--a purple gown of pure linen. She is a woman of strength and dignity and has no fear of old age” (Proverbs 31:17; 22; 25).

Families are hard work. In order to make our family relationships replenishing, we must be replenished. Psalm 46:10 instructs us to “Be still, and know that I am God.”  Let’sapply this verse specifically.

Be still, MY MUSCLES, and know God’s RELAXATION. 

Be still, MY NERVES, and know God’s REST.

Be still, MY HEART, and know God’s QUIETNESS.

Be still, MY BODY, and know God’s RENEWAL.

Be still, MY MIND, and know God’s PEACE.

In order to be all that we can be to our families, we must be all that we can be mentally,             physically, spiritually and emotionally. We must be balanced. The Proverbs 31 woman was energetic and hard working for the tasks she was gifted and called to do. Proverbs 31:25 tells us this woman could laugh “at the days to come.” The picture here is of a woman who enjoyed her life. She worked hard, but she knew how to stop and plant a vineyard. She liked to shop and watched for bargains. She liked to look beautiful, dressing in purple fine linen. 

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 “You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.”

We cannot give our heart to God and keep our body for ourselves. When you take care of yourself, you are honoring God and loving your family.

Remember your audience.
The final way to enjoy and love your family is to remember who your audience should be.

Proverbs 31:28-31 “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.’ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”

It is easy to run the race of life for the wrong audience. Our audience should be God, our mate, our children and then others. One day we will stand before God as keeper of the family He has loaned to us for a short time. Will He be pleased? Will He say “Well done?” Will our family stand and bless us? Will others say this woman loved and enjoyed her family?

Let’s Pray
"Lord, you know my inadequacies. You know my weaknesses, not only in parenting, but in every area of my life. As you broke the fishes and the loaves to feed the five thousand, now take my meager effort and use it to bless my family.

Please make up for the things I did wrong. Satisfy the needs that I have not satisfied.  Wrap your great arms around my family and draw them close to you.

And be there when they stand at the great crossroads between right and wrong. All I can give is my best, and I, today, choose to do that. Therefore, I submit to you my family and myself and the job I have done and will do as a wife and mother. The outcome belongs to you." (Author unknown)

Now it’s your turn
How would you define “family” in your life?

Which one of the steps covered in this series of devotionals do you need to take in order to have the family God wants you to have?

Set aside time to pray for each family member.

More from the Girlfriends
I truly believe our greatest opportunity to impact the world is the way we love and enjoy family. I pray that you have been blessed by this study. I encourage you to examine your family in light of these principles. Identify one that needs some work and get started. It is never too late to start and it is always too early to give up, girlfriend. And know that Gwen, Sharon and I are right there with you on this journey.

Be sure to check out Mary’s resources onmarriage, parenting and difficult relationships. If you need help dealing with the pain in your life, enroll in Mary’s weekly online Bible Study,How to Handle Hurtand learn how to face and deal with the pain in your life. Need a friend? Connect with Mary on Facebook or through email.

Seeking God?
Click here to find out more about
how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

Girlfriends in God
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info@girlfriendsingod.com
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Prayers for our children

I got this in one of my daily email from Girlfriends in God and I just wanted to share with you all. 

I pray for Maddie all the time and these are some perfect ones to add to it.

• Know Christ as Savior early in life. (Psalm 63:1, 2 Timothy 3:15)
• Have a hatred for sin. (Psalm 97:10)
• Be caught when guilty. (Psalm 119:71)
• Be protected from the evil one in each area of their lives: spiritual, emotional, and physical (John 17:15)
• Have a responsible attitude in all their interpersonal relationships (Daniel 6:3)
• Respect those in authority over them. (Romans 13:1)
• Desire the right kind of friends and be protected from the wrong friends. (Proverbs 1:10-11)
• Be kept from the wrong mate and saved for the right one. (2 Corinthians 6:14-17)
• Be kept pure until marriage (as well as the one they marry). (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)
• Learn to totally submit to God and actively resist Satan in all things. (James 4:7)
• Be single-hearted, willing to be sold out to Jesus Christ. (Romans 12:1-2)
• Be hedged in so they cannot find their way to wrong people or wrong places and that the wrong people cannot find their way to them. (Hosea 2:6)

 

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth ~3 John 1:4 NIV

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Praise the Perseveres

April 29, 2011

Praise The Perseveres

Gwen Smith

Today’s Truth
About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. (Acts 16:25, NIV)

Friend to Friend
Andrea lives in Lake Mary, Florida and is the proud momma to four beautiful girls. Two of her daughters are identical twins who have cerebral palsy and are severely disabled. Over the past 14 years, Andrea and her husband have been through the ringer. Her days are spent caring for the twins. And they are grueling days: filled with many tears, outbursts of frustration, and bouts of anger. There have been times that she has felt abandoned by God. Andrea admits that on many days, she has called out to God like the psalmist did: Answer me when I call to you, O my righteous God. Give me relief from my distress; be merciful to me and hear my prayer (Psalm 4:1, NIV).      

Through it all, however, Andrea has determined that she will praise God in spite of the daily complications. “I have always prayed for healing for my girls,” she shares. “I believe that with the mere thought of our God that my girls could be restored. I know that if He heals them I will spend my life praising Him for that miracle and telling others of His goodness. Of course, although God can heal them, I’ve had to learn to spend my whole life praising Him simply because He is God – whether He heals the girls or not. I decided very early on that God is still God no matter what He allows in my life. I can trust Him even when I can't understand Him.” She thoughtfully finished with this statement: “It sounds easy, but it hasn't been.”

Oh, how I can relate to honestly like that! How I’m drawn to this type of God-courage. Her challenges are great, but she is determined to praise God anyway. When I hear stories like Andrea’s, my heart stretches toward trusting God. I hear and feel that the trials in her life have led her to a greater dependency on God and a deeper trust in His sovereignty. I’m reminded that in every situation, I come to a crossroad and have a choice: I can pout or I can praise. I can turn away from God because I don’t understand or I can turn toward God in full assurance that His understanding is enough for the both of us – even if it hurts – even if anger lingers – even if doubt looms.

Have you been to these crossroads?

God shows us a powerful example of praise that perseveres in chapter sixteen of the book of Acts. During the Apostle Paul’s second missionary journey, he and his ministry buddy Silas encountered a collision of faith and trouble while in Philippi. After Paul cast out a demon that was terrorizing a young slave girl, he and Silas were seized by disgruntled Roman citizens and dragged to the marketplace before the rulers. They were then wrongfully accused of public disruption. They were stripped, beaten, and unlawfully jailed without a trial. After the flogging, Paul and Silas were taken to the in the inner cell of the prison, normally reserved for the most dangerous offenders, and their feet were placed in stocks. 

Though they had every reason to sit and stew because of the injustice of their situation, Paul and Silas chose to trust in God's plan and praise their Lord, Jesus Christ. Though they had open wounds and would have been in severe physical pain, Paul and Silas chose to glorify the name of God. “After they had been severely flogged, they were thrown into prison, and the jailer was commanded to guard them carefully. When he received these orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in the stocks. About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them,” (Acts 16: 23-25).

Then God shook the earth and the prison foundations and loosed the chains of the prisoners. In horror, knowing he would be held responsible for the escape of the prisoners, the jailer raised his sword to kill himself – but Paul stopped him. He and Silas hadn’t fled. They stood amidst their dark circumstances and spoke and sang with confidence in their God.

As a result, several people, including the jailer and his family, came to believe in Jesus Christ. “The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. He then brought them out and asked, ‘Sirs, what must I do to be saved?’”

“They replied, ‘Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household.’ Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all the others in his house. At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his household were baptized. The jailer brought them into his house and set a meal before them; he was filled with joy because he had come to believe in God—he and his whole household,” (Acts 16:29-34).

Though we won’t always rejoice in our circumstances, we are commanded to always rejoice in the Lord. “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus,” (Philippians 4:4, 6-7).

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance,” (James 1: 2-3). When we praise the Lord through, and in spite of what we face, our praise becomes our deliverance through the trial.

“We also have joy with our troubles, because we know that these troubles produce patience. And patience produces character, and character produces hope. And this hope will never disappoint us…,” (Romans 5:3-5a NCV).

No matter what difficult times we encounter, God is worthy of our praise. When we choose to praise, we choose to trust God. When we choose to trust God, the broken world around us lifts their eyebrows in wonder – just like the Roman jailer. Sometimes a sacrifice of praise is required. Offer it. We can and should choose to bless His name through the pain, which astonishingly can bring His joy into our hearts.

Let’s Pray
Dear Lord, Thank You for being trustworthy and praiseworthy! I ask that You will nudge me to trust You each time I approach the crossroads of faith and trouble. In spite of the burdens on my heart and challenges in my path right now, I praise Your name and celebrate that Your hope will never disappoint. In Jesus’ Name I pray, Amen. Pin It

Learning to be a {Good Wife}

I have been trying lately, after reading The Power of a Praying Wife and several other books, to be the wife my husband needs.  What I have learned though is that it’s not all about that.  Submitting to most, and used to be to me, is a bad word.  I also thought that all those verses were so awful, submitting in EVERYTHING!!  I would really get upset over that.  When he spoke hatefully to me, didn’t want to help out with certain things, all the excuses I gave to not submit. 

After reading more I have learned that we are not just submitting to our husbands but we are submitting to our Lord!  That is the most important part!  Doesn’t He deserve that from us!?!  After all He has done for us?   Believe me,  I’m still not perfect and will never be, but I am slowly learning and I think as long as I keep learning and trying then that is all He wants!

I am an Imperfect Wife!

“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.”  Ephesians 5:22-24

I got another wonderful devotional from the ladies at Girlfriends in God and I really loved the list Sharon gave from her book.  Here it is…

 The Power of a Woman's Words.
Sharon Jaynes
Words to Never Say to Your Husband
1.      I told you so.   
2.      You just don't think.  
3.      It's your fault.  
4.      What's wrong with you? 
5.      I can't do anything to please you.
6.      All you care about is yourself.  
7.      You never listen to me.  
8.      I don't know why I put up with you.  
9.      What do you want now?  
10.  How many times do I have to tell you?

Words Your Husband Longs to Hear

1. I've been thinking about you all day.
   
2. What can I do for you today? 
   
3. How can I pray for you today?
   
4. The best part of my day is when you come home.
   
5. You are one of God's most precious gifts to me. 
   
6. You are so wonderful.
   
7. You look so handsome today. 
   
8. I don't feel complete without you. 
   
9. I will always love you. 
   
10. I trust your decisions.

"A good wife is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds" Proverbs 31:10

The Heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.  She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.  Proverbs 31:11-12

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Praying for our husbands

A dear friend sent this to some more ‘Imperfect Wives’ and I just had to share it.  Something I need to print and do everyday.  I do pray for my husband but it is nice to not always have the same prayer…

His Head –That he will look to You as Lord of his life.                         (1 Corinthians 11:3)

His Mind – That he will have the mind of Christ and think as the Holy Spirit would lead him and not the flesh. (1 Corinthians 2:16)

His Eyes –That You will keep his eyes from temptation and that he will turn his eyes from sin. (Matthew 6:13, Mark 9:47)

His Ears – That he will hear Your still small voice instructing him.      (1 Kings 19:12, Psalm 32:8)

His Mouth – That his words will be pleasing to You. (Proverbs 19:1)

His Neck – That he will humble himself before You and be strong, courageous, and careful to do everything written in Your Word so that he will be prosperous and successful.                               (James 4:10, Joshua 1:8-9)

His Heart – That he will love and trust You with his whole heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5, Proverbs 3:5)

His Arms – That You will be his strength. (Psalm 73:26)

His Hands – That he will enjoy the work of his hands and see it as a gift from You. (Ecclesiastes 3:13, 5:19)

His Feet – That You will order his steps and that he will walk in Your truth. (Proverbs 4:25, Psalm 26:3)

 

Oh and guess what?  My friend Beverly, that sent me this, said she got it from Girlfriends in God!  Love them! 

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Being Patient..

It’s like Mary Sutherland was writing this about me!  Love it.  Another great devotional from Girlfriends in God!  Hope you all enjoy and have a blessed weekend!!

Click on their banner for more wonderful devotions!

February 4, 2011

Coming Out of the Dark

Mary Southerland

Today's Truth
"I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry" (Psalm 40:1,NIV).

Friend To Friend
Patience is not my greatest virtue. I do not like to wait - for anyone or anything - which is precisely why you should never get in line behind me at the grocery store. It doesn't matter if there are two people or ten people in front of me, my line will invariably be the slowest line. I do not like to wait on God either ... but was forced to do so when I found myself sitting at the bottom of a pit called clinical depression. I was empty and more tired than I had ever been in my life. I kept asking, "How did I get here?"  

Depression is not an overnight phenomenon. I can honestly say that I don't know a single person who has climbed out of bed in the morning and said, "Hmmm ... I think I will jump into the pit of depression today." Deliverance from that pit is usually not an overnight process either. It takes time and patience.

1.  Wait.  The psalmist simply says, "I waited." Waiting is not passive. Waiting is meant to be a time of preparation, a time of rest and healing,  

• To wait means to accept the pit.  Isaiah 45:3 (NIV) "I will give you hidden treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." 

Any time "LORD" is capitalized in Scripture, it means "Abba Father." This verse indicates that our Father has gone before us and in every dark moment or painful circumstance has buried a treasure or stored a secret. The only way we can find the treasure or learn the secret is to pass through that darkness. Some things cannot be learned in the light. To wait means to accept the pit, knowing it is for our good. 

• To wait means to admit there is a problem. Isaiah 40:29 (NLT) "He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak."  

Emotional health begins at the point of emotional integrity with a willingness to say "I need help!" When clinical depression overwhelmed my life, my husband was the pastor of a large church in South Florida. We could choose to be transparent and real or we could sweep my struggle under the rug. We concluded that in order to be right, we had to be real. Dan and I shared my battle with the staff, the deacons and then with the entire church. Yes, we took a risk but learned an important lesson in doing so. A shared load is a lighter load. We were created to need each other.

• To wait means to be still.  Psalm 40:1 "I waited ..." To wait means to hope in and look for someone or something who will rescue us.

  So much about God can never be known on the run. I was so wrapped up in serving God that I had failed to be wrapped up in Him. During those two years in the pit, I not only gave up every role of leadership, there were many times when I could not even attend church because of panic attacks. God taught me an important truth. He is more concerned with who I am than what I do. No one can take my place in His heart.

2.  Be patient.  It took twenty-two years for the McDonald's hamburger chain to make its first billion dollars. It took IBM forty-six years and Xerox sixty-three years to make their first billion. Harvey Mackay, in his book Swim with the Sharks, tells of an interview with the 88-year-old President of Japan's largest and most successful electrical enterprise. The interview went as follows:

Question: Mr. President, does your company have long-range goals?

Answer: "Yes."

Question: "How long are your long-range goals?"

Answer: "Two hundred and fifty years."

Question: "What do you need to carry them out?"

Answer: "Patience."

David said, "I waited patiently for the Lord." The word "patiently" means "without tiring and with perseverance." It took me many years to hit rock bottom. It took me two years to climb out of that pit and I am still climbing. Yes, I still battle depression from time to time. Depression keeps me broken and on my face before God - and that is a good thing.

Depression may not be the problem you are facing, but at some point in life, we will all face some kind of pit. It may be a pit that we have dug with our own hands of wrong choices or it could be a pit that has been uniquely designed for us by the enemy. But a pit is a pit - a place of paralyzing fear and numbing doubt that is constantly fed by our human frailty and desperate attempts to escape the darkness. 

The good news is that God is drawn to broken people. Psalm 40:1 says "He turned to me." Notice it does not say that David turned to God. Honestly, I doubt David had the strength to turn to God ... so God turned to him. God heard the cry of David and he will hear yours. I don't know if you are in a pit and need help or if someone you love is in that pit and needs your help, but one thing I do know is that the purpose of the pit is to purify and then restore. Right now, surrender the broken pieces of your life to God. He can and will bring you out of the dark. 

Let's Pray

Father, I am so tired. I can't hear Your voice or sense Your presence in my life. My faith is weak and I need Your strength to go on. Right now, I am laying the broken pieces of my life at Your feet and counting on You to come through for me.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
Read Psalm 40:1-3. "I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God."

Circle all of the "action" words in these verses. What does God ask you to do? What does God say that He will do? Do you believe Him? Are you willing to let Him be God in your life? Pin It

AAA Club of Marriage by Sharon Jaynes

I got another wonderful devotional from Girlfriends in God the other !day and just wanted to share it with everyone!  They always have just great devotionals!

 

February 1, 2011
AAA Club of Marriage
Sharon Jaynes
Today's Truth
"And let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband-that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly" (Ephesians 5:33 Amplified).
Friend To Friend
Are you a member of the Triple A Club of Marriage?  You didn't know there was such a thing?  Well, there's not an official one that you can call if your marriage breaks down, but I have one that I keep in the back of my mind.  It stands for adoration, admiration, and appreciation.  Did you know that big tough man of yours longs to be admired?  He desires for someone to think he's brave and brilliant, loving and logical, tough and tender, handsome and humorous, masculine and magical. That's the stuff of your man's dreams.   
What does it mean to adore your husband?  Basically, it means to love him with all your heart...and let him know about it. Someone once said, "I like not only to be loved, but to be told I am loved."   Do you want to see your husband's face light up like a full moon?  Tell him you are amazed that he knows how to ________ or that you are impressed by his _______, then sit back and watch him glow.
When the TV cameras pan the sidelines of a college football game, my heart always melts in a pool of butter when a young man waves his hand and says those precious two words: "Hi Mom."  It's almost like he's saying, "Look at me! Look at me!"  The truth is men want to be admired by the woman of their dreams.  It starts with mom, and then continues with the Misses.
Where does your husband go for adoration, admiration and appreciation?  He goes somewhere.  All men do.  Does he go to work in hopes of hearing "job well done"?  Does he go to the ball field in hopes of hearing "way to go man"?  Does he go back home to mother to hear "I'm so proud of you son"?  Does he work late in hopes of a few compliments from the gals in the office? Does he feast on compliments from patients or clients? Does he hang out at the gym flexing and building his biceps?  Tell me, where does your man go to be admired?
Dr. Willard Harley says, "When a woman tells a man she thinks he's wonderful, that inspires him to achieve more.  He sees himself as capable of handling new responsibilities and perfecting skills far above those of his present level.  That inspiration helps him prepare for the responsibilities of life.  Admiration not only motivates, it also rewards the husband's existing achievements.  When she tells him that she appreciates him for what he has done, it gives him more satisfaction than he receives from his paycheck.  A woman needs to appreciate her husband for what he already is, not for what he could become, if he lived up to her standards.  For some men - those with fragile self-images - admiration also helps them believe in themselves.  Without it these men seem inherently more defensive about their shortcomings....While criticism causes men to become defensive, admiration energizes and motivates them.  A man expects - and needs - his wife to be his most enthusiastic fan.  He draws confidence from her support and can usually achieve far more with her." (Dr. Willard Harley, His Needs Her Needs (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Fleming H. Revell, 1986) p151.)
You become the mirror in which your husband sees himself.  So if he's looking sort of glum lately, maybe you need to renew your membership into the AAA Club of marriage and try a little adoration, admiration and appreciation around your home. 
Let's Pray
Dear Lord, I pray that I will be my husband's biggest fan.  Please help me restrain my critical tongue.  Help me to see him as You see Him...a child of the King.  I do so love my husband; help me to make sure that he knows just how much.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.
Now It's Your Turn
If you have been withholding admiring words from your husband, it may feel strange to begin giving them.  First and foremost, be authentic - be real.  If you contrive admiring words, he will be able to tell.  Start with one compliment or word of appreciation.  It may be as simple as "thank you." Soon the admiration will begin to flow...hopefully both ways.  Here are some ideas to get you started: 

• Place an "I love you sign in a public place." (I put a sign outside of my husband's office window to surprise him on Valentine's Day.  The fact that all his patients saw it was an extra boost!)
  
• Write him a love letter.
  
• Write an acrostic from A-Z of reasons you adore, admire, and appreciate him.
  
• Leave an "I love you" message on his voice mail.
  
• Write him a thank you note for something specific he did for you.

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Lost & Found

I got another great post from Girlfriends in God on Monday.  After reading it, I could totally relate to it.  I never really considered myself lost but now looking back I can see that I was.  Yeah, I prayed and believed in God and His Son but not like I do now.  Now thinking about what God did for us, sending His ONLY Son to die for us… US!  I don’t deserve it, I seem to let Him down daily and His Son but They continue to love me, stay with me and be patient with me!  Everything that Jesus went through, His life… growing up and how He lived.  He was so patient, calm, kind and loving to all!  The ‘cup’ He chose to drink because His Father said it had to be.  He did it all for His Father and for us!  and He still asked His Father to forgive them for they know not what they do… 
Yes, I was so very lost and didn’t even know it.  God and His Son still chose to stick with me, wait patiently on me and chose to forgive me, for all the wrong I did and for not loving Them they way that They loved me.  After rededicating, finding an AMAZING Pastor and church family, amazing Christian brothers and sisters online is what helps me to see how lost I really was.  I am so thankful for Their love and for my new families love!  And I am so very thankful that I have now been found!!  Check out the song Alabaster Box at the very bottom.  Thanks Desiray for telling me about the song.  Great song!!!


January 3, 2011
What Does It Mean to be Lost?
Sharon Jaynes
Today's Truth
"For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost" (Luke 19:10 NIV).
Friend to Friend
It was our first trip to Disney World and my video camera was poised to capture those precious memories. But the video didn't start out as I had planned. As it begins, we're in some type of welcoming center where children are running around climbing on various objects, crawling through tunnels, and swinging from monkey bars.  As the "movie" comes into view, the first thing I see is my husband, Steve, running toward the camera, his face growing larger and larger until it fills the frame.
"Where's Steven," he cries. "I can't find him anywhere!"
Then the screen goes blank.
What a way to start our vacation! Steven had wandered away, climbed into one of those tunnels and had yet to emerge. Of course we panicked. Who wants to lose their kid at Disney World? Of course we found him. He had no idea he was even lost.
Ah, did that last sentence give you pause? He had no idea he was even lost...
Even as I wrote it, God quickly reminded me that I was in the same situation. There is no one more lost than someone who doesn't even know that he is lost. I had no idea I was lost, and yet my Heavenly Father found me.
Lost. It is still very relative to the human condition. What does it mean to be lost? How did we get into this situation of such lostness, darkness, and emptiness? It all began in the Garden of Eden when man chose to disobey God and sever their relationship. The Bible tells us, from the very moment Eve sunk her teeth into the forbidden fruit, and every person has been born with a live body and soul, but a dead spirit - separated from God. Rejected. But God did not leave us that way.  As soon as Adam and Eve disobeyed God, the shadow of the cross appeared on the horizon and God began to unfold His magnificent redemptive plan. 
After Adam and Eve disobeyed, they hid from God.  When He came looking for them in the cool of the evening, He asked the first question recorded in the Bible...Where are you?  That question runs like a scarlet thread from Genesis through Revelation.
Where are you?  No matter what you've done, no matter how far you've strayed from His perfect plan for your life, He is always in pursuit of you.  We come into this world lost, separated from God, wandering around looking for something, and yet not even sure what that something is.  All you have to do is come out from hiding and say...Here I am, Lord.
From Genesis through Revelation, we see that plan unfurl right before our eyes. In my next devotion, I'll look at what it means to be saved. The book of Romans outlines the steps of salvation beautifully. We're going to take a walk down the Romans Road to discover how to move from rejected to accepted...how to receive the gift of eternal life in the future and abundant life today.
Let's Pray
Dear Lord, Thank You for pursuing me, for finding me, and for saving me. I was so lost and didn't even know it. Thank You for rescuing me even in my ignorance. 
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

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Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti

I got another great email from Girlfriends in God on Friday and I just had to share it with everyone.  A really great way to describe men and women!  lol

 

December 17, 2010

Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti

Pam Farrel

We hope you are enjoying the Girlfriends in God daily devotions.  We (Mary, Sharon, and Gwen) would like to introduce you to some of our special friends.  From time-to-time, the Friday devotions will be written by one of our friends in ministry.  We call them our "Friday Friends."  So grab your Bible and a fresh cup of coffee and drink in the words from our "Friday Friend",
Pam Farrel.

Today's Truth
"Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God" Romans 15:7.

Friend to Friend
Why is communication with the opposite gender so difficult?  Because Men are like Waffles, and Women are Like Spaghetti. That's our way of explaining Genesis 1:27:

"So God created man in his own image,   . . . male and female he created them."

So how can we understand how God created the opposite gender? Men are like waffles. Men process life in boxes. If you look down at a waffle, you see a collection of boxes separated by walls. That is typically how a man processes life. Their thinking is divided up into boxes that have room for one issue and one issue only. The first issue of life goes in the first box, the second goes in the second box and so on. The typical man then spends time in one box at a time and one box only. When a man is at work, he is at work. When he is in the garage tinkering around, he is in the garage tinkering. When he is watching TV, he is WATCHING TV! Social scientists call this "compartmentalizing."

As a result of thinking through life in boxes, men are natural problem solvers. They enter a box, size up the "problem" that exists and formulates a solution. A man strategically organizes his life in boxes and then spends most of his time in the boxes he can succeed in. And when he brings up a subject to talk about, he actually thinks it is that subject you will be discussing. He likes to stay "in the box."

In contrast to men's waffle-like approach, women process life more like a plate of spaghetti. If you look at a plate of spaghetti, you notice that there are individual noodles that all touch one another. If you attempted to follow one noodle around the plate, you would intersect a lot of other noodles and you might even switch to another noodle seamlessly. That is how women face life. This is why women are typically better at multi-tasking than men. You can talk on the phone, prepare a meal, make a shopping list, work on the planning for tomorrow's business meeting, give instructions to your children as they are going out to play and close the door with your foot without skipping a beat!

As a result, most women are in a pursuit of connecting life together so they solve problems by talking things through. This creates significant stress for couples because while she is making all the connections, he is frantically jumping boxes trying to keep up with the conversation! The man's eyes are rolling back in his head while the tidal wave of information is swallowing him up. When she is done, she feels better and he is overwhelmed. The conversation might look something like this:

Honey, I was driving by your favorite truck store yesterday, you know the one where you got the cup holder? Right by your truck store is my favorite dress store, and there is the cutest suit in the window. It's my color, you know I went to that seminar on colors and I found out I was a "winter" so I knew if I got  this suit you would say, "Oh Baby!" and I love that! You know the suit reminded me of the one Mrs. Clinton wore for that press conference a few years ago. You know when she was talking about Eleanor Roosevelt talking to her? I wanted to say, "Hillary, Eleanor is dead!" That's so weird, thinking you are hearing from a dead person. Kind of like that new age stuff I have been hearing is in the schools. What if our kids get some of that in the classroom? I think we should stop and pray for the kids.

He has been frantically jumping boxes, trying to keep up, and wondering, "Where is this conversation going?" And while you think he is praying he is really asking, "So what about my truck?"  

Today, express your appreciation to your "waffleman" (your husband, son, dad, brother, or male co-worker) and his compartmentalizing, problem-solving DNA. Look for the upside of the male gender as you interact.

Let's Pray
Lord, the men in my life are so different than I am. Please help me value, appreciate and compliment the guys in my world today. Help me see them from Your perspective not mine.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

Now It's Your Turn
The question I am asked most often as I speak for women's conferences is, "How can I get the man in my life to open up to me?" So whether it is your spouse, your son, your dad, brother or friend, keep these things in mind as you seek to emotionally connect:

·         Men like to spend time in "boxes" where they feel successful and comfortable.

·         Men are more likely to open up and share when they are in these comfortable "boxes."

·         Men are slower to reveal themselves and share emotionally than we are.

·         Stay on subject or "in the box" he is interested in talking about.

·         The best way to get a man to open up is to go into his favorite "box" (join him in what he loves best) and be a good listener.

More from the Girlfriends

My husband likes to quote his favorite "philosopher" when speaking on gender differences: Rocky Balboa of theRocky movie. When asked by Adrian's brother, "What you doin' with my sister?" Rocky replied, "I got gaps, she got gaps, we fill each other's gaps." Men are like Waffles, and Women are Like Spaghetti --those differences can work for us!

Today, make an effort to look at the positive side of the opposite gender of your husband, son, dad, brother, friends and co-workers. When he brings up a subject to talk about, today, just try it - talk about THAT subject - stay in the box! To learn more ways to value the "waffle" in your life, order Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti at www.billandpam.org.  Pin It

Girlfriends in God

I got another great email from Girlfriends in God and I just had to share it.  What a great reminder!
 

Eating Crow
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life--in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing "(Philippians 2:14-16 NIV).
Friend to Friend
Sometimes we like what life serves up to us, and sometimes we don't, but most of the time it simply depends on the attitude of the person holding the spoon. Such was the case one evening when I went out to dinner with friends to the Sanitary Fish Market. I know that is a strange name for a seafood restaurant, but it was a great place that everyone frequented in Atlantic Beach, North Carolina. Since the food was good, I guess it was a nice plus to know that it was sanitary as well.
One evening, when I was eighteen-years-old, I went out to dinner with three friends.  Three of us were Christians and the fourth was not. Larry was very macho and preferred the, "I'm in control of my destiny" approach to life. But we loved him anyway.
The three of us Christians usually took a moment to ask a blessing before we had a meal, but we had not eaten in a restaurant with Larry before. He was surprised and embarrassed when we bowed our heads to pray. Larry held his head high and proud as if to say, "I might be at the same table with these people, but I'm not one of them."
All four of us ordered clam chowder as an appetizer. We had the same waitress and same chowder, from the same pot. We three "holy rollers" (we acquired this name because of a 10-second prayer) dipped our spoons into our bowls and tasted chowder full of tender clams and steamy potatoes.
Then proud Larry dipped in his spoon to retrieve only broth. "Why is your chowder full of clams and potatoes," he demanded, "and all I've got is broth?"
Larry was about to call the waitress over and complain when I looked up and said, "Well, maybe it's because we asked God to bless ours and you didn't."
Larry didn't complain to the fine people at the Sanitary, but ate "crow" instead. It is amazing how God takes a grateful heart and fills it even more! Feeling empty today? Stop and praise God for His goodness. Feeling lonely today? Stop and thank God for His presence. Feeling anxious today? Stop and thank God for His provision. 
Let's Pray
Dear Lord, so many times I am quick to complain when I haven't even asked You to bless my day. Help me to have an attitude of gratitude and become a woman who talks to You regularly, thanks You consistently, and praises You throughout the day.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.
Now it's Your Turn
Keep a list of all the times you complain today.
Keep a list of all the times you compliment or encourage someone today.
Keep a list of all the reasons you have to be thankful today.
More from the Girlfriends
Don't you love reading stories of God's fingerprints on the pages of everyday life!  Sharon's gift book, Extraordinary Moments with God is full of them.  It's the perfect Christmas gift for someone you know who needs an extra dose of heavenly inspiration...and that person may even be you!  Pin It

The Taste Berry

Got another excellent devotional from Girlfriends in God and wanted to share it.

Mary Southerland


Today's Truth
Psalm 138:2 "I will give thanks to your name for your unfailing love and faithfulness, because your promises are backed by all the honor of your name."
Friend to Friend
Alexander Whyte, the Scottish preacher, always began every prayer with praise. One brutally cold Sunday, his people filed into the church, wondering what the preacher could possibly find to praise God for on such a miserable day. Alexander Whyte stood, bowed his head and prayed, "O Lord, we thank Thee that it is not always like this."
Are there times when you don't feel like praising God? Honestly, our feelings are irrelevant when it comes to praising God. Praise is not about us. Praise is all about God. Praise is a deliberate choice and a learned habit that produces contentment and an attitude of gratitude.
In Philippians 4:11, the Apostle Paul writes, "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances." In this verse, "learned" means to be "educated by experience" and the word "content" means "contained." Paul's contentment was the result of the resources contained in his heart. In other words, Paul used his circumstances as tutors in the school of praise. He learned how to give God praise even when he was beaten, ridiculed, in prison and facing his own death. Paul's attitude did not reflect his circumstances. Paul made a deliberate choice to praise God - no matter what. Why? Because Paul knew that even when he did not understand God's process, he could trust God's heart.
Let's pretend for just a moment. Suppose I went to my local bank and tried to cash a personal check for a thousand dollars. I can assure you that when I presented that check to the teller, she would have burst out laughing. She knows what I have in my bank account. Now suppose Bill Gates walked into his bank and presented the teller with a personal check for a thousand dollars. I can assure you that the teller would not burst out laughing. In fact, she would promptly cash that check. She knows what Bill Gates has in his bank account.
When we come to Jesus Christ, all of His promises are credited to our spiritual account. And there is a money-back guarantee on every promise of God. That is why we can praise Him - no matter what.
Praise invites God to take up residence in the middle of whatever mess we are facing.
Psalm 22:3 "But You are holy, Enthroned in the praises of Israel."
Praise produces trust in God and strengthens our faith.
Psalm 42:11 "But, O my soul, don't be discouraged. Don't be upset. Expect God to act! For I know that I shall again have plenty of reason to praise him for all that he will do. He is my help! He is my God!"
In Africa, there is a fruit called the "taste berry" that literally changes a person's taste buds so that everything tastes sweet and pleasant. Sour fruit, even if eaten several hours after the taste berry, becomes sweet and delicious.
Praise is the "taste berry" for every Christian. Praise is more than emotions or spoken words, singing songs or lifting up hands in worship. True praise is the celebration of God, His power, His works and His greatness. Praise is the fruit of a committed heart and the tool of a life completely surrendered to God.
When we are discouraged, praise reminds us that there is hope in God.
When we are afraid, praise reminds us that no matter what happens, God is with us.  
When we are lost, praise reminds us that God has already been where He is leading us. 
When we are confused, praise reminds us that heaven is not in a panic.
Right now, girlfriend, lift up your head and praise your God. He is with you and He is more than enough.
Let's Pray
Father, I praise You for Your love and Your mercy. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I praise You for sending Jesus to die in my place, to pay for my sin. I praise You for the family and friends You have given me. I praise You for this ministry of Girlfriends in God and for every woman who reads each word. Please bless them and fill their hearts with Your presence and Your power as they praise You.
In Jesus' name,
Amen.
Not it's Your Turn
Read the following verses of Scripture and fill in each blank.
I will praise God with ________________.
Psalm34:1 "I will praise the Lord no matter what happens. I will constantly speak of his glories and grace."
I will praise God with ________________.
Ephesians 5:19 "Speak to one another with psalms."
I will praise God with _____________.
Psalm 69:30 "Then I will praise God with my singing!"
I will praise God with my ____________.
2 Corinthians 5:15 "He died for all so that all who live--having received eternal life from him--might live no longer for themselves, to please themselves, but to spend their lives pleasing Christ who died and rose again for them." Pin It

Stand Up Straight

Stand Up Straight, Girlfriend!
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God" (Luke 13:13 NIV).
Friend to Friend
When my brother was a teenager, my mother used to threaten him when he hunched over at the dinner table.  "If you don't sit up," she'd say, "I'm going to buy you a back brace from Sears." Now I don't even know if Sears made back braces back then, but it sounded like a pretty good threat to me.
Then I had a son who grew to six feet seemingly overnight.  He didn't know what to do with all that height, so he slumped.  I tried my best not to say, "If you don't sit up, I'm going to buy you a back brace from Sears." 
Then one night, my father-in-law took care of it for me.  We were measuring and marking various family members' height on the dining room doorframe.  (Yes, you read that correctly-the dining room.  Some battles are just not worth fighting).  My seventy-seven-year-old father-in-law, who stood at about 5'10", stood with the back of his head against the doorframe.  Then he took a deep breath and extended his curved back to its fullest upright position.  We marked him at 6'3".
I watched Steven's eyes grow wider as Papa grew taller.  He saw firsthand the difference it made to stand up straight.  Papa was huge, but his bent over frame hid his once strong healthy stature.  Steven caught a glimpse of the strappingly strong frame that we once knew.  From that day on, Steve stood straight and tall.  Never once have I seen him slump since. 
That's what I'm hoping for you.  That's why I write devotions and books like I'm Not Good Enough...and Other Lies Women Tell Themselves and What God Really Thinks about a Women.  My hope is that you will see women who have stood to their full stature and want to do the same.  No more slumping in self-doubt or hunching in half-hearted conviction, but rather standing up to the full stature of a confident woman who knows that she is equipped by God, empowered by the Holy Spirit, and enveloped in Jesus Christ.
There are many emotions that cause us to slump spiritually and become crippled emotionally.  Worry wears us down.  Regret ruins our confidence.  Hatred hardens our hearts. Unforgiveness uglies our souls.  Bitterness binds our hearts.  Insecurity incapacitates our capabilities.
I was crippled for many years.  Words from my past told me I was "ugly," "not good enough," and "worthless."  Inferiority, insecurity, and inadequacy were my three closes companions.  I didn't like these three lurking shadows, but they followed me everywhere I went.  Stalkers, that's what they were.  They stalked me, yelling taunts and accusations that no one heard but me. 
The more I listened to them, the more emotionally crippled I became.  Then one day, Jesus called me up front.  I didn't want to go, mind you.  I had grown comfortable hiding in the back where I felt I belonged.  I could hear just fine from my seat along the wall.  The lighting wasn't as good, but it was enough to get by.
But then Jesus saw me and called me forward.  It wasn't that He hadn't seen me all along.  After all, He is El Roi, the God who sees.  There was never a day when I had not been in His sight.  But now the time had come for Him to set me straight in every way.  So He called me up front where others could see what He was about to do.  Jesus placed his nail-scared hand under my chin and lifted my eyes to meet his.  "Sharon, you are free from your infirmity of self-doubt."
It wasn't long after that, words began to flow.  From pen to paper, God filled me with words that overflowed to encourage and equip other sisters who needed to experience the same liberating freedom in Christ.
You know what?  I'm sure some on-lookers gasped at my courage and glared at my audacity as I stepped out of the shadows onto center stage.  "Who does she think she is?" they might have thought.
And I can answer that question.  I am a crippled woman who Jesus set free.  He calls me a child of God, light of the world, salt of the earth, bride of Christ, redeemed, holy, chosen, ambassador, saint, bride...and that's just for starters.  And friend, if you know Jesus Christ as Savior, then that's exactly what He calls you too!
So here I am today and you are reading one of my devotions.  A previously emotional cripple set straight and shored up by God.
Is there something in your life that is crippling your spirit?  Unforgiveness?  Bitterness? Guilt?  Resentment?  Sorrow?  Worry?  Regret?  Comparison?  If so, cut it loose, cast it off, and throw it away.  God calls us sheep; and sheep are not pack animals.  We are not meant to carry such burdens with these scrawny legs of ours.  If we try, we will only bend under the pressure we were never meant to bear.
Oh friend, He is calling you right now.  Whatever has been holding you back from being all God has called you to be and do all God has fashioned you to do...Jesus has come to set you free!  Stand up straight!  Do you feel the press of His hand on the crook of your back?  Do you feel his index finger under the point of your chin?
There's no doubt in my mind that you are reading this devotion because Jesus is calling you from the shadows to join him center stage.  He sees you, and now is the time.  You've been sitting in the back, in your crippled state far too long.  It is time.  "Woman, you are set free from your infirmity." 
Set me free from my prison that I might praise your name. Psalm 142:7
Now it's Your Turn
I want to go back and ask you the questions I asked in the devotion.
Is there something in your life that is crippling your spirit?  Unforgiveness?  Bitterness?  Guilt? Resentment?  Sorrow?  Worry?  Regret?  Comparison?  If so, cut it loose, cast it off, and throw it away.
Oh friend, He is calling you right now. Whatever has been holding you back from being all God has called you to be and doing all that God has fashioned you to do...Jesus has come to set you free!  Stand up straight!  Do you feel the press of His hand on the crook of your back?  Do you feel his index finger under the point of your chin?
Let's chat.  Write and tell me how God has set you free! www.facebook.com/sharonjaynes
More from the Girlfriends
Today's devotion was taken from Sharon's latest book, What God Really Thinks about Women: Finding Your Significance through the Women Jesus Encountered. We tend to read the gospels with our twenty-first century eyes.  But when we understand how oppressive the culture Jesus stepped into was toward women, we begin to understand just how radical Jesus' ministry, messages, and miracles were at setting women free.  He risked His reputation to save theirs...and yours.  To order this life-changing book, visit www.sharonjaynes.com. You'll fall in love with Jesus all over again. 
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Girlfriends in God
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